Who God Wants Me To Be

Lately I've been thinking about this statement, "I am on a journey to discover who it is God wants me to be."

Last year I stood by and supported my girls while they worked hard to learn the world of modeling and to be models. I stood by proud as I watched them win awards, be recognized for their inner and outer beauty and even accomplish getting modeling contracts.

This year I have stood by and supported my hubby as he has had the opportunity to work together with some incredibly talented people to collaborate on a album that is a dream come true for him. I've seen him work hard, learn new techniques, and then be able to sit back listen to the beginning stages of an incredible album that God has ordained to take us to places we've never been before.

But ... what about me? Do I get a turn? I have LOVED every minute of seeing my very most favourite people in the world see their dreams come true ... but still .....

Some of my dearest friends know that it has been a desire of my heart to join with other believers in a small group setting to study and learn together and pray together. When our girls were babies the group we were traveling with got the band together often for these times and kept promising that the mom's of the group would have the same opportunity while the dad's watched the kids. It never happened. About 2 years ago a friend invited a few of us to her home and we were able to bond, begin learning from each other, study the Word and pray for each other on a fairly consistent basis. Unfortunately, this time ended. I decided that with my schedule, the best way to join a small group would be an online group. I found one, bought the book, got my user name and password and began reading. Unfortunately I travel with a hubby who runs his business off this laptop, with one daughter who is taking an online course on this laptop and another daughter who keeps her "social life" running with this laptop. I'm last to get to use the computer. I've only been involved with my book club a couple of times. One more disappointment.

But ... my Father knew what I needed all along! The last week and a half have been spent at the beautiful Shell Lane Studio in Kensington, PEI where we are surrounded with nothing but water, red sand and incredibly talented people. Just the setting is enough to make you relax and take time to reflect. I was in charge of keeping the meals on the table, the house tidy and the kids moving forward with their schoolwork. One morning, while drinking coffee in the comfy country kitchen, God began to speak to me through Dan (our producer and good friend). I can honestly tell you that more was accomplished in those couple of hours than years of small group could have accomplished. The difference was in the timing and the attitude. Bottom line ... I do know who God wants me to be ... and I am already everything He wants me to be! I am a spiritual being with the purpose of intersecting with human experiences. So simple, so deep, so completely life-changing. Everything I do, every encounter I have is by Divine Purpose. I AM everything HE wants me to be!! I am already accomplishing His purpose for my life ... simply by living my life as a spiritual being and having human experiences.

I'm not sure if that speaks to you or even if you understand it, but for me it has been life-changing!

Fortunately/Unfortunately ...

I distinctly remember being in grade 2, sitting in a circle with my classmates, with my teacher reading a book to us to teach us the meaning of the words "Fortunately" and "Unfortunately". It was something about a man who ... "Fortunately got to take a ride in a hot air balloon. Unfortunately the balloon failed and began falling. Fortunately it landed on something soft". You get the idea!

Well ... the last couple of weeks have gone something like that! Fortunately we planned a great fundraiser at our home church to raise the money to finish the new album my hubby is working on. We had some great things planned for the concert. Unfortunately on the morning before the concert, the company we were getting the snow machine from called to say the snow machine wasn't working. Fortunately we were able to locate another one on the morning of the concert. It was on a truck travelling on the 401 and had already passed Belleville, but fortunately the driver agreed to pull off and drive back to Belleville to drop the machine off! Fortunately we had some great help getting the concert to run smoothly. Jeff and Carolann McCann have joined our team and they were instrumental in getting out the advertising, securing the snowmachine, helping serve coffee and cheesecake prior to the concert and making sure the concert was LIVE via the internet. Fortunately all aspects of the concert seemed to run smoothly. Unfortunately we came in quite a bit shorter financially than we had hoped.

Fortunately we had a completely uneventful drive to Charlottetown over the next couple of days. Fortunately the guitar player, Tom Vitacco from Chicago (worship pastor at Willowcreek) arrived just fine as well. Unfortunately the plane our producer, Dan Cutrona, took from Toronto was delayed by two hours.

Fortunately Tom spent the next two days laying down all the guitar parts to the drum and bass tracks Andrew and Dan had recorded in Toronto the previous week. Fortunately they sounded amazing! Unfortunately while Tom was flying home on Wednesday morning we discovered that somehow the hard drive would not transfer the guitar files! Unfortunately we spent the next two days trying to figure out what was wrong. We finally gave up! Fortunately Tom agreed to record the tracks in the Willowcreek studio and send them to us as soon as possible. Fortunately Andrew was able to add his vocals to the tracks over the next several days without any trouble.

We packed up and were ready to leave mid-afternoon on Monday, but decided to listen to what we had accomplished in 8 days first. The van was completely packed, the kids were ready to go and yet here we all sat in the studio listening to this incredible production! Words that come to mind are "stellar", "sensational" and "brilliant". We were all moved to tears. When we had finished listening, I honestly felt like I had been to the best concert in my life! Fortunately, you too will be able to enjoy this production in the spring of 2008! Andrew along with Dan Cutrona and Paul Milner are a winning team! I'm sure the Father was grinning from ear to ear!

Fortunately we live in the beautiful country of Canada. Unfortunately, if you are travelling in Canada in November you can expect to experience all kinds of weather within a 24 hour period. And we did!!! On the drive home we experienced dark clouds, sunny skies, heavy rain, fog, freezing rain and lots of snow! Fortunately we arrived home to our sparkling Christmas lights (see previous post!) without any trouble ... tired, but with a sense that we had accomplished what God had set before us to do.

Countdown 'til Christmas

Just the other day, in the middle of a busy homeschooling morning, Savannah took a break and left the schoolroom. I heard her pause outside the door, gasp and then whisper, "Does Mom know?" At that moment I knew my Christmas-loving hubby had started the decorating for Christmas! My hubby has always LOVED Christmas and so I always let him do every bit of the decorating. This year, since our schedule is so hectic, he decided to decorate early so that whenever we ARE home, we can enjoy the season! By evening on OCTOBER 22 our entire house was completely sparkling waiting for Christmas to arrive! What a joy it is to come home after a concert and/or a long drive to a beautifully decoarted home!

ps. Just for the record, he also disassembles all the Christmas stuff!!